Under The Counter

baskets notice
182 views

Dirty, thieving baskets!

Whether it was a minor outbreak of civil disobedience, or just good old-fashioned thievery, UTC doffed his flat...

Beer belly
305 views

If he only had the guts

Ye cannae whack a ridiculous job title, that’s what UTC always says. . So it was all-hail oatcake manufacturer...

drone
407 views

What’s that droning sound?

As well know, the old fella loves a pointless celebratory day so he was very taken with the...

Spanish vending machine
391 views

They do things differently in Spain

UTC is indebted to Paul Seenan of Edrington-Beam Suntory, a good friend of SLR, who took time out of...

Shaw Meats' gluten-free arse blasters
183 views

You’ve taken that too far

UTC is well aware that ‘free-from’ is all the rage these days but he couldn’t help thinking that...

280 views

Clarity, consistency and alcohol

It’s not often that UTC agrees with drinks industry watchdog The Portman Group – in fact no one...

Cock flavour soup
290 views

Tesco merger yields results

A kindly reader got in touch with UTC last month to send him a pic of a new...

1926 Macallan whisky
498 views

The ideal birthday tipple

As anyone who knows him will testify, the auld yin is not above begging – or bribery or...

Garry Haigh and friend
693 views

A tribute to the World Cup’s best saves… by retailer Garry Haigh

There will no doubt be many contenders for keeper of the tournament at the World Cup, but very...

Sour beer
608 views

Good idea turned Sour

It may be one of the latest trends in beer, but UTC is having none of it. Low...