Under The Counter

UTC-branded porn star martini
554 views

Porn star’s days at M&S numbered

It’s not every day that we get the chance to put the words ‘porn star’ and ‘M&S’ in...

Stuart Broad
642 views

From Headingley to Putney

Not being a huge fan of rounders, UTC normally lets the Ashes pass him by. That was, however,...

Brussels sprout gin
932 views

Brussels sprout gin. Just naw.

They say that the older you get the quicker time goes – which partly explains UTC’s difficulty with...

Davie Dodds
2255 views

Davie, where are you when we need you?

An avid collector of sales pitch dressed up as legitimate research, UTC’s favourite example from last month was...

Peanut Butter Kitkat Chunky
2628 views

And the Tweet of the month goes to…

Politics can be very thin ice for the auld boy to skate on, so he ordinarily avoids it...

Self-scanning checkout with 'Walmart: investing in American jobs' sign
2786 views

In-store comms. You’re doing it wrong.

You must be very careful these days as a business when it comes to ‘living your values’, as...

Australian whisky
3445 views

UTC’s world turned upside down

Now as well know, UTC likes a dram. And we also all know whisky is Scottish. We can...

Adult video and wart ointment plastic bags
3433 views

Plastic reduction in the bag

There’s more than one way to skin a moggy, as UTC discovered when he learned of how one...

seagull eggs
3376 views

The £90 omelette

It doesn’t take much to trigger a bout of colourful language and furious rightful indignation by the auld...

'CoPo' sign
3455 views

You had one job…

UTC would like to put on record his thanks to Mintlaw retailer Sid Ali for bringing this little...