We’re not swallowing that

When you’re selling something as unsexy as toothpaste with charcoal in it, you’ve got to work a bit harder with your marketing, so UTC was duly impressed by the headline in a press release from White Glo – ‘Doctor Recommends Brushing Teeth After Oral Sex’.

Thinking he had clicked on a link to spoof news website The Daily Mash, the old boy was taken aback to find that the release was genuine and not just another bit of Trump fake news after all.

White Glo Deep Stain Remover Activated Charcoal Whitening Toothpaste (to give it its Sunday name) could apparently help reduce STI risks.

UTC refuses to be drawn on what he made of this bombshell, other than to reiterate his commitment to Dentu-Grip and Euthymol as they’d never let him down yet.

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