Under The Counter jetted off to Ibiza recently for a thoroughly undeserved break from SLR Towers.
And so it was that the White Isle was subjected to the Even Whiter Body, as the Auld Boy reluctantly peeled off his string vest and stripped down to a scandalously revealing thong to soak up some Spanish sunshine.
In a way this suited him just fine, since Mrs UTC had cajoled him into going all-inclusive. UTC was therefore reluctant to stray too far from the poolside bar and its dazzling array of watered-down spirits.
On one of his rare forays outside the hotel he was, however, tickled to stumble across a Spar minimercado with quite a USP.
Unlike some of its more high-end Spar siblings in Scotland, this one didn’t boast electronic shelf edge labels, self-scan checkouts and LED lighting. Neither did it offer food- and drink-to-go from the likes of Chicago Town Pizza, Costa Coffee, Calippo, Fanta or Rollover Hotdogs.
What did set it apart from any other Spar the Auld Boy had ever dragged his wizened frame into was its car hire facility.
And even better – judging by the sign – it appeared to rent out the very same model that UTC passed his driving test in.
