Starburst my arse

Opal Fruits

Not that he’s stuck in 1963, but UTC has never been a fan of giving perfectly well-named products new brand names just for the damn sake of it.

A Snickers will always be a Marathon, as far as he’s concerned. And what the hell was the point of renaming the Dime Bar the Daim Bar?

So it was a cause for celebration the other day at SLR Towers when the good people at Mars Wrigley announced that they were bringing back Opal Fruits, a mainstay of the auld boy’s youth.

Not only will Opal Fruits be back on our shelves, they’ll even have the original lemon and lime flavour. None of that blackcurrant Starburst nonsense.

One downside to this whole festival of joy is that Opal Fruits will be launching first in Poundland. UTC has never been a fan of jumble sales at the best of times, but he might just have to brace himself for a battle through the nearest Poundies to recapture a wee moment of his long-forgotten youth.

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