As the auld boy will angrily tell you, the only thing you should put in a glass of whisky is more whisky.
Connoisseurs insist, however, that adding a little touch of water helps to release the flavours of the whisky. Lots of whisky buffs people swear by it – but UTC isn’t one of them. Grouse tastes just fine on its own, thank you very much.
So you can imagine the flurry of flabbergasted emails to his colleagues when he received a press release from Scottish firm Birkentree which has specifically launched a birch water that “naturally complements single malts”.
A what water? Did they just say birch water? As in, water from birch trees?
It’s a snip at £5.95 for 100ml and, according to Birkentree, the optimum ratio of whisky to birch water is 50:50.
UTC’s fine comments shall go unrecorded.