Staff at an off-sales in the US were stunned to find the store wrecked overnight by a masked intruder – later discovered lying face down in the bog, sleeping off a booze-fuelled orgy of destruction.
The culprit – a raccoon, as it turns out – had crashed through a ceiling tile and presumably couldn’t believe its luck at landing in a shop full of bevvy.
Fully embracing its ‘trash panda’ nickname, the furry felon then roamed the aisles tipping over boxes, smashing bottles and getting completely and utterly melted on the hard stuff.
“Lightweight,” scoffed Under The Counter, after seeing a photo of the hapless beast sprawled next to a toilet bowl, no doubt enjoying the coolness of the floor tiles between waves of nausea.
Why the criticism? Well, the Auld Boy has been drunk as a skunk on more than one occasion. He has never, however, went doon like a raccoon.
