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Roll and banjo, anyone?

Smug is the best word to describe how the auld yin looked recently when Food Standards Scotland updated its advice on eating runny eggs.

It’s apparently now completely safe for everyone, even “the more vulnerable” [Like UTC, then? – Ed] to eat them, as the risk of salmonella has been totally eradicated.

The auld fella’s daily roll and banjo that morning was arguably the tastiest of his life, he assured everyone at SLR Towers. [Clarification: ‘Roll and banjo’, named after the comical motion of trying to scrape yolk off your jumper after biting into a roll and aforementioned runny egg. – Ed]

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This publication contains images and information relating to tobacco products. Please do not view if you are under the age of 18 years old.