As someone who’s drunk plenty of supermarket own-label lager, Under The Counter is no stranger to crap beer, but he’s never heard of a beer made from crap. Bear crap, at that.
Yes, you read that right: bear crap beer.
The minds behind this marvel are, obviously, American. For some reason, hiking gear brand Columbia Sportswear has launched ‘Nature Calls’ – a “beer infused with real bear poop”.
Call UTC old-fashioned, but when nature calls his first instinct is to open a window and light a match – not can the evidence and flog it to unsuspecting ramblers. But what does the Auld Boy know; the USA is not called the land of opportunity for nothing. Even if it’s an opportunity to ingest ursine shite.
To help shift more units of a potential slow seller, Columbia has filmed an ad starring Lance Moore and Daunte Culpepper. These are not, as their names suggest, thespians employed in the adult entertainment industry, but erstwhile American footballers. The two professions shouldn’t be confused, however. One involves tight ends, wide receivers and double teaming; the other is an overly complex, never-ending bastardisation of rugby.
Nature Calls is described as a “crisp lager” offering a “hint” of American black bear droppings. This “hint” is balanced with a touch of honey and huckleberry.
You won’t catch the Auld Boy swapping his trusty Tennent’s for Nature Calls. He’s always found huckleberry a bit pretentious.
